“When you read the bible you realise everyone hated Jesus….He could have easily lost the plot and lost his shit but he kept it together.” Jarryd Hayne in a recent press conference.

Jarryd Hayne spent much of his season with the 49ers sitting on the bench but it wasn’t time wasted. The rugby league legend buried his head in the Good Book and the wisdom he gained is a gift to us all.

Jarryd on the Good Samaritan

“Jesus told a story about this Jewish dude who got the shit bashed out of him on the way to Jericho. No one helped him, except for a Samaritan. That was a big deal because Jews and Samaritans hated each other as much the Blues hate the Maroons. So yeah, not all Queenslanders are dickheads. Don’t be a hater.”

Jarryd on Doubting Thomas

“After Jesus died he came back from the dead, because he was Jesus. It was an even bigger comeback than Allan Langer’s Origin return and the Apostle Thomas missed the show. He said, “Unless I put my finger in the nail holes I won’t believe it happened.” He was the kind of guy who wouldn’t celebrate a try cos he didn’t see the grounding. Anyway, Jesus came back just for Thomas and invited him to put his hand in his wounds. This all went down before they could go to the video ref.”

Jarryd on Jesus in the Desert

“Before Jesus was put on the cross he wandered in the desert for a few days. It was a bit like taking time off in Fiji, but hotter. The Devil met him there and he tempted Jesus, like during the Super League days when even crap players were offered big money contracts. But Jesus kept his shit together and said no thanks. The point is, you’ve got to be true to yourself, whether you’re playing for Parra, the 49ers, Fiji or the Gold Coast.”

Pic created from a photo by Craig Bush, used under this license, and a photo from PNG Rugby Football League used this license